Atheist praying

Yesterday was more of the same. Lots of weakness. I tried to take a walk but didn't make it very far before tiring. My throat is still sore even today. Tonight I will do a castor oil pack, which helps the liver and lymphatic system clear toxins from the body. Or so I have heard. Castor oil packs always make my stomach growl like crazy, so I know something is happening. And I usually feel pretty good afterwards. 

The boyfriend is baking yams for me as we speak. I just ate a bowl of organic strawberries. Earlier I had a shrimp, radish, carrot, romaine and avocado salad with basil dressing and freshly made organic mint lemon aid. For breakfast, a boiled egg and gluten free toast and butter and coffee. Also, lots and lots of water. I know my metabolism is on the fritz because in my early twenties a diet like this would have had me as skinny as a rail. 

I had another acupuncture session tonight. I tried to visualize healing during my session. It is thought that perhaps the mind can heal the body and I think it's probably true. If stress causes illness and negative thoughts cause stress, then we truly can influence the state of our bodies by the thoughts that we have. It's up to us which way those thoughts go and if we are practiced in negativity, it takes a certain level of discipline to attempt to reign in old patterns and create new ones. I have come light years in this respect over the past year alone, but I still have light years to go. 

I had the hubby call a local place here in town and signed us up for free introductory yoga sessions on Monday and Sunday. Hopefully the yoga won't be too much for me. It's introductory yoga and I used to be relatively advanced before I got sick, so I remember the intro yoga to be very gentle. Unfortunately, my perspective has changed a little, so I'm somewhat nervous. I should probably tell the yoga instructor about my situation, just in case I have to stop in the middle of things. Anyway, if we like it there we will get memberships and start doing yoga on a regular basis. This will be my first attempt at becoming physically active again. 

My history professor from college sent me a book recently titled "The Human Condition" by Thomas Keating. Today I received from him the guidelines for a centering prayer that he meant to send along with the book. 

The centering prayer is very simple. 

1.) Choose a sacred word (or simple attention to your breath) as the symbol of your intention to consent to God's (my insert: or the Universe's) presence and action within.

2.) Sitting comfortably with eyes closed, settle briefly, then silently introduce the sacred word (or attention to breath) as the symbol of your consent to God's (or the Universe's) presence and action within. 

3.) When you become aware of thoughts, return ever so gently to the sacred word (or attention to breath)

4.) At the end of the prayer period, remain in silence with eyes closed for a couple of minutes.

The paper recommends at least twenty minutes but to do what you can, or rather, "pray as you can, not as you can't". 

I think there is something to be said for an atheist praying. There are places in the brain that light up while in deep prayer or meditation. These centers, or so I have read, are the same area in the brain that registers the capacity to feel pleasure. You can cultivate these centers and thus increase your capacity for joy. Interesting, no? Scientifically, spiritually or otherwise. 

Okay, time to eat yams.